How to Keep Trying When Nothing Feels Important or Meaningful

How to Keep Trying When Nothing Feels Important or Meaningful

How to Keep Trying When Nothing Feels Important or Meaningful
When we’re struggling with chronic and intense mental health challenges, it’s easy to lose sight of the activities, people, or ideas that bring us a sense of meaning and purpose. That larger concept of what’s important to us—our values—can feel completely out of reach.
Sometimes, our emotional struggles become so chronic and all-consuming that we don’t know who we are, what we care about, or what gives us fulfillment and identity. During these times, reconnecting with what matters can feel impossible. And let’s be honest—trying new things that might not even help? It’s a tall order, especially when it comes with the possibility of unpleasant emotions tagging along for the ride.
If you’re feeling this way, know that you’re not alone. It’s completely valid to feel discouraged, sad, angry, or any other emotion when you feel disconnected from what matters to you. The good news is, even when nothing feels important, there are ways to start gently exploring meaningful activities again. Here are some ideas to support you in continuing to try:

1. Channel Your Inner Scientist

Approach re-engaging with meaningful activities like a curious scientist running an experiment. What specific challenge are you trying to address? Brainstorm ways to tackle it, form a hypothesis, and decide how you’ll measure the results.
For example, let’s say you’re trying to address feelings of disconnection. You could hypothesize that sending a friend a text might help you feel more connected. After trying it, evaluate—did it help, or could you tweak something next time?
By shifting your focus to curiosity and learning, you remind yourself that re-engaging in meaningful activities is about growth, not about “success” or “failure.”

2. Try on a Value

If nothing feels meaningful right now, experiment with “trying on” a value for a few days. For example, if you were to value compassion or adventure, what small actions might align with that?
Break it down into low- and high-bandwidth options. If you’re trying on compassion, a low-bandwidth action could be silently wishing someone well as you pass them, while a high-bandwidth option might be volunteering or writing a heartfelt note.
At the end of your experiment, reflect on how it felt to act in alignment with that value. You might discover it resonates—or not—and both outcomes are okay.

3. Let Painful Emotions Point You Toward What You Care About

“We hurt where we care, and we care where we hurt” is a popular saying in Acceptance & Commitment Therapy. Painful emotions can often signal what’s truly important to us.
For instance, if you feel deep sadness when you’re alone, that might point to a value of connection, love, or belonging. If you’re frustrated by feeling stuck in life, it could mean you value growth, freedom, or creativity.
Instead of avoiding painful emotions, try observing them with curiosity. What might they be telling you about what matters to you?

4. Start with Bite-Sized Actions

Reconnecting with meaningful activities doesn’t have to mean diving into something big. Small, manageable actions can be powerful.
If creativity is a value, start by doodling on a napkin, looking up art on Pinterest, or trying a simple craft kit. If connection feels important, send a funny meme to a friend or join a casual online group. These small actions teach you that even when things feel heavy, you can still engage with what matters.

5. Don’t Wait for Motivation or “Good” Feelings

One of the most tempting traps of living with chronic mental health challenges is waiting—waiting for painful emotions to subside, for energy to return, or for motivation to magically arrive. The truth is, waiting often keeps us stuck.
Instead, remind yourself that you can take meaningful actions even when you’re feeling low. Adjust your actions to fit your bandwidth—maybe a quick text instead of a long phone call, or a five-minute walk instead of a full workout. What matters is moving in the direction of your values, no matter where you start.

You Are Not Alone in This Process

It’s hard to keep trying when nothing feels important or meaningful, but every small step you take—no matter how tiny—is an act of courage. You’re reminding yourself that your values, your identity, and your purpose are still there, even when they feel far away.
Reconnecting with what matters is a process, not a one-and-done task. So, approach it with curiosity, gentleness, and self-compassion. You’re worth the effort, and you don’t have to do it perfectly to make progress.
Start small, meet yourself where you are, and trust that even the smallest actions can lead to meaningful growth.

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